Post by Amari <3 on Dec 16, 2020 4:09:42 GMT
"What am I supposed to do father? How do I go on without you in my life? What honest purpose do I have now that you are gone? Now I am stuck here in a pride that has moved on over night and has never looked back even once. Those that cry for you do so in the middle of the night, falling upon deaf ears. I feel awful for the youngest of us, your offspring. Young Kovu and Vitani barely even remember you.. Your already fading away into nothing, back to being just dust." Amari spoke out loud, almost daring her father to show himself, she wouldn't be afraid of no ghost. She just wanted to have a purpose again, something more then just being a hunter in a massive pride. Was that so wrong? She wanted to have meaning. The idea of being a Queen wasn't something she had ever really desired, but now that her father was gone... She had to admit it had a certain ring to it. Queen Amari. It sounded good didn't it?
She never spoke these thoughts out loud to anyone, keeping her fantasy a complete secret from the world. Glancing around the gorge she frowned slightly, her hope of catching a sign from her sire was not happening. It was hard to accept that he would never give her advice again or even keep her warm in a storm. Amari had to keep herself warm and content during all the scary moments. Her eyelids felt heavy as she closed them, a few warm tears slowly running down her cheeks.
The grief was raw and very real. She knew that her mother had only become pregnant to her father because of pressure. A lot of lionesses had become pregnant to give him a suitable heir. He had explained it to her once that it was a normal custom that most prides do. Most prides consisted of males and females, and all the females in the pride would have those males cubs. Then in a few years new males would come and kick the older one's out, and start all over again. Most of the world was not romantic like the Pride Lands.
Most lions never experienced love, at least romantic love. If anything the love of family was what mattered the most. She had accepted it and hadn't worried about it anymore. It was hard to see her mother's solemn face at times but she had grown to ignore it. Instead she had spent more time with her father and his wife Zira. They had begun teaching her how to survive, how to fight, how to hunt, and how to rule.
Amari cracked one eye open to stare at the cracked and broken tree in the center of the gorge. A testament to the sin her father had committed so long ago. Around the tree was a large rock and green grass, it was a rather beautiful place in such a barren area in the Pride Lands. Even now the broken was beautiful. She had to carry on his legacy along side his other offspring.
For now she had decided to hide herself in the shadows of the gorge wall. She wanted to take a rest and try to relax. Amari had a reputation to uphold after all. Curling into a ball the young lioness continued to stare at the tree and grass, her tears still silently running down her face.